Approaching Women with Confidence

By this time, you already know that approaching a woman you want to meet or learn more about should not be a big deal, since you have already learned that your goal at this point is to just see what you have in common and see if she might be fun to hang out with.

Approaching women that you don’t know is nothing to be intimidated about and it does not really matter if they might be younger than you, really attractive or anything else.

This is because the thing that really matters is whether or not there is noticeable chemistry when you first start talking, regardless of how attractive she might be.

Be calm and patient

Part of the art of approaching women is not putting pressure on yourself to try to get her to like you and not thinking about anything other than just seeing if she is someone you might have fun with. When you approach women in this manner, you create a friendly, warm environment that is open and relaxed, making the situation much more conducive to getting to know each other comfortably and flirting. Being nervous is one of the top things that will ruin any chance of naturally occurring chemistry. Why do men get nervous when approaching women?  The simple answer is that it is because they put too much pressure on themselves, which comes from forming opinions about the girl before even talking to her and assuming that she has also formed an opinion about them.

This creates an expectation of what is supposed to happen and how the encounter will go, completely killing spontaneity and any chance of initial chemistry. Confident guys understand that trying to make something happen is a surefire way to make sure it doesn’t happen.

Confident guys don’t approach women with preconceived ideas about them and are able to naturally sense if the woman they are approaching might be right for them.

Too many guys let their mind get in the way in regards to dating. What happens is that their minds get in the way because they are so focused on thinking about and analyzing the situation that they can’t just act naturally. This is why some guys employ the Three Second Rule in an effort to keep their minds from getting in the way.

Guys who use this as part of their tactics for approaching women allow themselves no more than three seconds to approach a woman they are interested in. The reason they do this is because they know that any more time than that will allow their minds to get in the way and mess up their game.

Knowing these tricks and recognizing which tips will work best for you is part of honing the art of approaching women.

Focus on her

Your mind really is not going to provide you with a lot of help when you are trying to meet women. It’s important that you recognize this and that you learn to consider all of your mind’s expectations, opinions, fears and chatter as unimportant and definitely not as interesting as what you are experiencing right at that moment.

Set these thoughts aside and focus on the girl you are talking to, where you are and what you are doing at the moment. Stay in the now, which is where the action is, and just know that analyzing everything that happens or is said is just going to sabotage you and wreck the good experience you are having.

Stay focused on the woman you approached and reserve you responses just for her, ignoring whatever your mind has going on. Listen to her, relax and enjoy the interaction. Don’t get caught up in figuring out the next thing to say. Enjoy what is going on and the feelings you are feeling. Express yourself and this feeling of attraction in ways that come across as natural, which might include giving her a compliment, catching her eye as you smile at her or touching her arm.

Allow the experience to deepen and to naturally transform into one of those moments when it feels like you and she are the only two people in the room. Allow yourself to become absorbed in the experience and enjoy it. Since you are not trying to make her feel anything in particular, you can just do this for you and enjoy the conversation and experience.

The second you stop expecting something when approaching women, you immediately set yourself apart from the vast majority of guys who might have also approached them that same night. Women don’t like it when it’s clear that some guy has approached them and started a conversation with the sole intent of getting their number or getting them to agree to a date.

An important part of the art of approaching women is not trying to control the outcome and just letting things happen naturally.

Just focus on enjoying the interaction. If you are enjoying it, stick around and continue the conversation. If you aren’t, then simply be polite as you excuse yourself, regardless of whether or not you think you have a chance with her or how hot she is. When you don’t allow your mind to get in the way and simply enjoy meeting women – and talking and flirting with them – you will see that approaching a woman can be easy and fun.  This is when you will truly begin to understand the art of approaching women.